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Ben Affleck as Batman. NO. #Batman @BenAffleck

Bitter, Bitter Balcony, Movie Review,   Bitter,Bitterometer,meter  

Most have you have probably heard that Ben Affleck (A.K.A. crappy Daredevil) is going to be the next Batman. This is sad news as we will have to skip the next few Batman films and the next Superman film. The only way to show Hollywood that this is not a good idea is to not pay for the film. Let’s just go ahead and NOT watch this film, especially opening weekend.

Bad Hollywood films should be punished. The only punishment they know is failure. Let’s save some cash and skip out on crappy films/decisions.

Update: Here’s how I, JAS, feel about it… I think there really has not been a good casting choice for Batman by Hollywood yet. There have been competent actors whose performance were able to save them/the movie from being miscast. I honestly think Bale, with his lisp and weak chin, was a terrible decision. The thing is, is those scripts were very strong and he’s a decent enough actor that it kept him from failing. As long as they write to Affleck’s strengths, not sure what those are, they could make OK Batman films.

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"Workforce" web series! Co-created by JAS!

 

The bitterest half of Bitter Balcony, JAS, has a web series almost at its first season end. "Workforce" is a skit-based comedy series about a group of coworkers trying to make it through the workday.

Workforce's website ~ Facebook

Workforce

You should give it a view and check out how even someone as bitter as JAS can have a sense of humor. ;)

Workforce

More seasons to come!

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"The Flying Man" a new kind of superhero

 

This new look at superheroes is pretty damn interesting. Let's hope Hollywood notices this one and helps turn it into a feature film.

The Flying Man from Marcus Alqueres on Vimeo.

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Jack the Giant Slayer (A.K.A. A giant pile of dung)

Bitter, Bitter Balcony, Movie Review, Jack the Giant Slayer 2012Darren Lemke,Christopher McQuarrie,Dan StudneyBryan SinterEwan McGregor,Nicholas Hoult,Stanley Tucci Bitter,Bitterometer,meter Jack the Giant Slayer(2012)
 

Brought to you by Brian Singer we get an adaptation of “Jack and the Beanstalk” for the big screen. Yes, typing that last sentence was taxing because we aren’t joking. We can only assume that Singer had some contractual obligation to make this movie and had no choice. This adaptation has giants, a beanstalk and they say “fee fye foe fumm” in it. The rest is just Hollywood trying really hard at making the old tale into a blockbuster and failing in the process.

We follow Jack. He’s a nobody with good intentions, but after defending the princess she quickly takes a liking to him. She eventually visits his home, which I have no idea how she knew where it was, and a beanstalk seed meets water whisking her up to the floating land of the giants. Jack, who clearly likes the princess, volunteers to help rescue the princess. A group of the kings best, Jack and the princesses betrothed make it to the giant’s land and seek out the princess. Naturally, the giants have the princess and so the rescuing begins. The giants eventually come down to the surface of the human world to wreak havoc.

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Bitter Balcony Deals with Daddy Issues (and Plot Devices) with The Place Beyond the Pines!

Bitter, Bitter Balcony, Movie Review, The Place Beyond the Pines 2012Derek Cianfrance, Darius Marder, Ben CoccioDerek CianfranceRyan Gosling, Bradley Cooper Bitter,Bitterometer,meter The Place Beyond the Pines(2012)
 

It’s been a while since Jas and I have butted heads over a movie, and for that reason alone, “The Place Beyond the Pines” is my favorite movie of 2013 thus far. I love it. Jas hates it. Jas destroyed Derek Cianfrance’s generational interconnecting drama, spotting both narrative and technical failures in the movie’s framework. I countered with an emotional response, the power of a flawed yet passionately driven film that has resided in my subconscious. I admit my brother is one astute and merciless debater. Yet, I was not deterred to defend the metaphysical poignancy Cianfrance captures gracefully in this ambitiously delivered small town saga. Cianfrance succeeds in his use of the mechanisms of fate near the same class of Alejandro González Iñárritu did for “Amores Perros” and “Babel.” “The Place Beyond the Pines” will provoke a response. Hey, sometimes friends fight.

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Crypticon 2013 begins tomorrow!

 

We’ve attended Crytpicon Seattle in 2010 and 2011, reviewed it 2012 and now the time has come to venture forth and enjoy the convention again.

This year’s guest lineup includes some fine film folks like Cassandra “Elvira” Peterson, Dana Ashbrook, Jon Stewart James Duval and many more. You can even have some fun singing some karaoke tunes with Nicholas Brendon. You can find the full list here.

Cassandra Elvira PetersonJames Duval

Guests are not just what it’s all about; there’s a film festival, artist alley, and movies like the Northwest premiere of “Birdemic 2: The Ressurection”. You can find the event list here.

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Zack Braff needs your help!

 

Zack Braff has created his own Kickstarter attempting to get funding for his next written/directed/acted feature film. He’s got a script titled “Wish I Was Here” ready to go, too!

For the fans of “Garden State” that are tired of waiting for Braff’s next movie this is your chance to help! It’s day one and he’s already hit half of his two million dollar requested budget.

The Kicstarter page can be found here.

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