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Nightmare on Elm Street to shame screens April 30th

 
Nightmare on Elm Street (Remake)

Yup, it seems about that time again. Time to get another remake of a classic '80s horror film. On April 30, 2010 to be exact.

We'll be making an event out of this possible stinker right here at Bitter Balcony. Why, you ask? Easy. Because it gives us an excuse to see the classics all over again. In the meantime I have to ask, "Is there anyone that is actually looking forward to this?" Furthermore, "Do all the trailers so far just bore, or is it just us?"

In the meantime, while you bombard this post with "Hey, you guyz suxorz," and "Dis moviez will be de bombz cuzz McBay is productaping," you can read our original trailer impression HERE and the review of "Nightmare on Elm Street: Part 4" HERE.

Tune in April 26 for "Nightmare Week!"

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Bitter Balcony rocks out with The Happy Hollows’ “Death to Vivek Kemp” video!!!

 
Bitter Balcony rocks out with The Happy Hollows’ “Death to Vivek Kemp” video!!!

Your friends at the Balcony have been in a bit of a film dry spell. What did you expect? With choices like “Repo Men,” “The Bounty Hunter” and “Remember Me,” our interest in the seventh art has taken a back seat. Not to worry, we’ll get back to watching crap for your enjoyment, but for now, we feature a cool animated video by Los Angeles indie band The Happy Hollows.

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Should Sam Worthington be considered a "move star"? Has he earned it?

 

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The worth of Worthington?

 
The worth of Worthington?
Seems like IO9 beat us to an article asking if Worthington was worth of the stardom he's recently acquired.

Personally, I feel he does the same crap every movie so far. I thought he might try something different at some point, but there are no signs of that.

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Interesting Star Wars fanimation

 

Here's an interesting fan animation of three scenes from "Star Wars," animated by Malcolm Sutherland. Sure, at some point we'll get sick of "Star Wars" fan shtuff, but in the meantime it's fun.

Star Wars Uncut - Scene 415 - "All wings report in..." from Malcolm Sutherland on Vimeo.

Two more inside.

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Hotties in Haiku: Daryl Hannah in "Splash"

 




Movement in water.

A splash, a shape, a figure?

Behold a mermaid!




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Chloe makes sex boring. Really.

 
Chloe makes sex boring. Really.

Chloe (Amanda Seyfried) is a high-class escort hired by elite Toronto clientele. Catherine (Julianne Moore) is a beautiful gynecologist whose husband David’s (Liam Neeson) precarious relationships with his students hint of infidelity. When Catherine reads a suspicious text message from David’s cell, the neglected wife recruits the services of none other than Chloe to seduce her nefarious spouse. Bitter Balcony is sorry; that’s our most uninspired opening to a review we have ever written, but for a movie like “Chloe” it’s appropriate. What follows in this script dusted off Joe Eszterhas’ attic is a series of pseudo-psychological blah blah, a bizarre stalking subplot and (while appreciated) head-scratching nudity by the leads. To the producers’ credit, they found a selling point for this movie with the soft-core sex that belongs in a Zalman King feature.

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