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EXCLUSIVE: Michael Bay's next film!

 


EXCLUSIVE

Michael Bay's next Blockbuster

Michael Bay has announced next summer’s big blockbuster and it’s not another Transformers. He’s called it his “dream project” and what will be the “defining picture in his career”.

Naturally, we were skeptical. However, once we saw some concept art and discussed the contents of the film with Michael himself we realized this would truly be the film he’s waited his entire life to make.

We all know about the bitter rivalry between Michael Bay and Uwe Boll. There was even a public challenge sent out by Boll to take Bay on in the ring for a death match, as seen HERE

And then this charming episode where he demonstrated what he would do to Bay.

What spawned this hatred? What was it that brought on this bitter rivalry?

Well, as we all know Uwe Boll sucks major ass loves to adapt video games to the big screen. It’s been his bread and butter for a while now and doesn’t seem to be stopping. The German government may have closed the famed tax loophole that helped him get funding in the past, but he still manages to make his movies.

Rumors at this years comic-con were that Bays new movie would involve Robots, explosions and scientists, but would not be Transformers 3. Fans of the series (all four) were dismayed that he would drop the series after the magnum opus that was Transformers 2 (exaggerating for effect).

It turns out that Michael Bay and Uwe Boll both petitioned Twisted Pixel about adapting their, then upcoming, Xbox game. This created a bidding war that Bay almost lost. The men were reported to have been within inches of coming to blows with each other as Bay continued to drive up the price.

Paramount had given Bay a limited budget for his film (as it was not worth the risk not being an established brand) and he would have to use part of this budget to gain the game’s movie rights. The further that Boll was able to drive up the price the less there would be for the film and it’s FX budget. The rights finally went to Bay at an undisclosed cost, said to near $45 million, the highest ever paid for a video games movie rights.

Production has been underway for a year now and Bay has given us this exclusive peak at concept art for his latest masterpiece…

Synopsis (off of xbox.com): Fools they were, to tread where knowledge should stay forbidden. For what emerged was not a man—it was Splosion Man™. "And all who saw him were 'sploded, for he was the fire and they were but meat." Able to 'splode himself at will, Splosion Man launches his way through levels, an uncontainable force.

Bay is excited to direct a movie with explosions about a man, which explodes to accomplish all his goals. While Bay says he is not a pyromaniac, but we all know better. He is said to have burned all the earlier concept art for the film saying that, “it wasn’t explosive enough.” Six months of redesign later and we are treated to three whole sketches, as seen below.

We here at Bitter Balcony must say that this is probably the wisest choice Bay has ever made. No one handles a movie with no plot and massive explosions like he does. This is the greatest vehicle for Bay to explode… and explode it he will!

We leave you with a few shots of the animated storyboards that we were treated to when invited to the top secret government-owned volcano island we were invited to.

We hope for the best in this film. We also hope that Bay chooses to play ‘Splosion Man himself and uses no CG to prove he is the master of pyrotechnics – all 18 pieces there will be after.

For a few more details on this story read HERE.





Source of the Bitter: JAS

Comments, rants and other stuffs below
KatanaDiva on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:56pm

Genius.

JAS on Thu, 08/27/2009 - 7:12am

Thanks! I couldn't help myself once I read about this game.

Anonymous (not verified) on Tue, 08/18/2009 - 2:10pm

it is either Michael Bay 'splode or our brain 'splode after watching. or all POPPED like brain popcorns.

I'd say good luch Bay and if that man's got so much confidence in the movie maybe we should give him a try. who knows, maybe the movie has a plot. after all the man made 'the Island', right? that movie has got a plot, right?

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